Monday, November 3, 2008

oh life, how you stress me out

i was sitting in class the other day. my professor was lecturing about stuff i would need to know for my career in the future. i found myself extremely disinterested all of a sudden and had a panic attack sitting there in my seat. all i could think about was the fact that i am in school for a reason and i have an intended career picked out. but what if i picked the wrong thing? i know that i can always go back to school later or change my mind and do something else, but that takes a lot of time and money. i came home from class extremely discouraged that day. i am almost halfway done with my junior year and i am scared to death of life. it's just me overthinking things, i know this. sometimes i wonder though, if i will ever figure things out. i secretly envy those people who have a master plan for everything. i have a hard enough time deciding what to eat for lunch, much less what to dedicate my life to. i have always been a worrier and gotten worked up over things that have eventually worked themselves out, perhaps this is one of those times. life tends to be unexpected at times, maybe something unexpected will happen to me. until then, i will continue to wonder what lies ahead.